Music: the passion that holds our family together

I enjoy reading Orson Scott Card's weekly column in Mormon Times. Some people will be familiar with Mr. Card's writings in the field of Science Fiction and his award-winning Ender's Game, a great series, particularly designed for youth. I am not a big Science Fiction fan, but Mr. Card's work is not limited to that genre and his inspiring column often gets me thinking. Such it was this past week.

The column of which I speak is titled "Who are we as a family?" (Sept. 11, 2010). In it he addresses the issue of how families distinguish themselves from one another through various characteristics unique to them. He mentions his own family's love of the theater and involvement on both sides of the stage; all the children are active in some aspect of the field of drama. Mr. Card mentions another family he knows that has the same preoccupation with sports, and yet another whose members are all involved with video gaming.

I can think of families whose uniqueness is defined by their love of travel, boating, fishing, mountain climbing, etc. But it didn't take me even a half second to identify what our family's passion is: music (you thought something else?). But instead of looking at who is under our roof right now (that would be two adults and two dogs), I can look at each of our "kids" (all adults now, of course) and most of their children as well.

Our oldest daughter, Patty, and her daughter Miracle are heavily involved in a local choral group where they have weekly rehearsals and frequent performances. It binds them together as mother and daughter while challenging them in their singing. Miracle also plays the flute, has played the piano, and just announced that she also wants to learn guitar (Grandma is so very proud!!). But Miracle's younger sisters are also musical and when the three girls sing together it surely must make the angels stop to take notice. One of the girls plays piano and the other is about to begin learning violin. Patty herself has been involved in music probably since she began to talk. She instilled that love of music into her children (she also has six children from her first marriage plus two step-children). All of those kids were involved in singing at church, but two of them - Emily and Amy - attended a performance-based high school so singing, instrument-playing, and drama were a major part of their adolescence. The oldest of the Patty's offspring, Kirbi, was accomplished on the violin and then graduated to the viola when she was growing up. After leaving her school years behind, she continues in her musical interests, often being asked to sing in church. It is no surprise that she met her husband on a stage and his profession - a professor of music and drama - brings music into the household virtually daily (we visited them in August and were treated to Joe's wonderful piano playing, but missed hearing a song from Kirbi). When the two perform together you know that they are bound by a deep love of music. What a blessing. Patty's other children also enjoy music, but have not pursued it to quite that same degree - they have other, just as valid, passions.

Our son Quentin learned to play guitar when he was young, but he discontinued that when he went into the Navy. But he never quit his love for music - it has only grown and changed. His music tastes touch on everything from hard rock (or whatever it is called now) to classical. But, when he met his lovely wife Mary Jane, he was introduced to Country music (about which, in the past, he had been less than complimentary). Now it is just as likely that a C/W song will be playing in his home as a classical piece. (Well, with two young boys, it's most likely that the songs on the stereo will be from Sesame Street! And Quentin, who has an amazing voice, will probably be singing right along!) Quentin's older children, now adults, also are music lovers. Jenifer played oboe when she was growing up and became quite proficient at it.

Sandi, our daughter in Georgia, brought lovely music into our home when she took up residence with us when she was in high school and continues to do so in her home near Atlanta. She married a music lover, too, who enjoys playing guitar and banjo, accompanying Sandi and their children for some family music time. Sandi's children all sing (a year ago when they were here for Christmas they made a family holiday CD - the "children" - two will be graduating college this next year - have grown up harmonizing together). Three of Sandi's children have been in competitive choirs and her daughter Kati has been involved in an a cappella choir in college. They are all natural performers. I cannot imagine what there house would be like if music was banned from the earth.

Our youngest son, Max, has taken his love of music into a completely different direction. As a child he sang in the school choirs and often was featured as a soloist. But as an adult he let his interests take him into the world of providing music for others as a DJ. He is getting known in Austin, where he lives, and is frequently booked to do weddings and private parties. He is as comfortable with music from the 1980s as he is with that from today or his father's childhood. His is another home where music is often heard. His young step-son, Zack (age 5), is already showing a musical talent and enjoys singing and dancing.

So it appears that I am correct in saying that the passion that binds our family members together is music. But it can also be traced back to those whose legacy we carry on. My husband, Butch, has nurtured his enjoyment of music, having been taught to appreciate it at the knee of his grandmother. How far back in his line the music gene goes, I am not sure. Of course, my kids are all my step-kids, but how much is nature and how much is nurture? My music roots extend into both branches of my family. My mother's maternal grandmother had been raised in a household where musical performances were frequently part of the evening's events and the family had a conservatory in the house (in Bohemia) where entertainment was commonplace. My father's maternal grandfather was a musician and he passed that talent on to my father, who was truly a genius on the piano and organ (and any other instrument he elected to pick up). He had perfect pitch and was very particular about the sound that was emitted by whatever was being played. It made performing in his presence somewhat intimidating, but, looking back, that was not necessarily a bad thing. Unfortunately, my mother was tone deaf, though she loved music and even tried to sing along (until my dad would ask her to stop). Nevertheless, our family get-togethers almost always included some music time (and, yes, much of it was recorded).

Now in our home, with two adults and two dogs, music is just a natural part of most events. Whenever we have a gathering, music is generally at the center. I like it that way, though some may see it as strange. When we celebrated our 30th anniversary, Patty and her family were here, along with about 25 or 30 of our closest friends, and after about two or three hours of music (we sat in a group on the porch taking turns singing and playing folk music), my granddaughter Mikayla crawled into her dad's lap, sitting next to me, and said that she finally figured it out: "This is a music party!" (I think she was waiting for some other part of the party to start!) I told her it was the only party we knew how to have and she nodded and agreed that she liked it.

Thank you, Orson Scott Card, for reminding me of the passion that has been in my family long before I came along and that I have taken the responsibility of passing on to the next generation and the one after that. Is there a passion that has bound your family together from one generation to the next and the next?

Music, music, everywhere!

The genealogy conference in Knoxville, TN was a wonderful experience . . . I did a lot of networking, I met many wonderful friends (some of which were already "friends" via Facebook), and learned some helpful hints to further my business of being a genealogist, speaker, writer, storyteller, educator, and troubadour. Now to find the hours to put it all together. My husband Butch and I have had much to discuss as we have driven across the miles in our now-smooth-running truck-camper (see earlier blogs). My first task when I get home: set up a working schedule for my various projects so that I will not find that a whole day has passed and all I have accomplished is facebooking (is that a verb?).

While I was at the conference I made a special note of how music was a part of the conference. Earlier I blogged about Sheila Kay Adams and her marvelous performance, but there was much, much more. I attended two breakfasts, hosted by FamilySearch, and in at least one (probably both) presentation(s) given, the PowerPoint slides were augmented by (you'll guess this): music! In one program, they showed differences in research repositories in different states, so the music changed to match the venue discussed (we associate music with geographic locations).

The keynote address included music - and the audience got to sing along with the television themes for "Daniel Boone" (representing Kentucky) and "Davey Crockett" (representing Tennessee).

Of course, the use of music was prevalent in both evening events (I attended only one of these, as already mentioned, but my roommate told me about the other and showed me the photos she'd taken of musicians at the museum they visited).

There was music in elevators.

When I went to dinner with some genealogy companions, we were entertained by a busker (street musician) before we walked back to the hotel.

Music was everywhere! (And I am sure that there was a lot I didn't hear - on iPods and MP3 players with earbuds plugging the ears of the listeners.)

My point: music was also a part of the lives of our ancestors. They had their street musicians to entertain them. And music in the parlor when the day was done. And I would venture to guess that a number of them followed the admonition of the 7 dwarfs and whistled while they worked! It just seems that messages are clearer, tasks are less arduous, leisure time is more fulfilling, and getting from one place to the next is made more pleasant by the addition of music. (Of course, if you work in an office, you might want to keep that work whistling to a minimum!)

So here's a challenge: listen to the music you hear in a given day and make note of how many times (or how many different tunes) and places where you are exposed to songs and/or instrumental pieces. I'd love to "hear" what you discover!

Making Music with Genealogists

Saturday, 12 June 2010, Marriott Convention Center, SCGS 41st Annual Jamboree:

(Photo by Dick Eastman, lifted shamelessly from his blog . . . Thanks, Dick, for sharing)


(Photo by Miriam Robbins Midkiff, used with permission)


Our ancestors would sing together after a long day of work. Tonight the genealogists who attended the Jamboree in Burbank had a taste of that experience. I took out my guitar and my husband came to join us and we raised voices in song, singing a bunch of old favorites. A small crowd gathered, drifting in and out throughout the hour of serenading, most singing along with "Golden Slippers," "Grandfather's Clock," "Old Dan Tucker," "She'll be Comin' 'Round the Mountain," "Long, Long Ago," "Oh, Susanna," "This Land is Your Land," "500 Miles," and more and more. What a fun time to harmonize with friends and strangers.


(Harmonizing with Thomas MacEntee - photo lifted from Dick Eastman's blog without permission - but hopefully with forgiveness . . . thanks, Dick!)


Music truly does bring folks together!

Music in 2010 - Y'all come join in!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

What an exciting time . . . a whole year ahead of us with not a single day used up yet.

This is the time that resolutions are made. I have never been one for resolutions, however. I figure that if I see a change that needs to be made, the best time to do it is now. Of course, there are certain things I schedule (but I'm always scheduling something). And there are some things I'd like to see completed before the end of the year.

In 2010, I'd like to see my CD of "Songs of Early Childhood" (songs of our ancestors from when they were children) completed. And it would be nice also to do the CD of my original songs (well, I will need to write at least two more songs to accomplish that).

On January 16 the Riverside Folk Song Society will celebrate 50 years of making music together! If you live in or near Riverside, or will be visiting the area on that weekend, consider yourself invited. To download the flyer, go to our webpage. Some of our original members will be on hand to share photos and memories of the past 50 years. The group has gone through a lot of changes over the years but the purpose and basic process has remained the same: to share our love of music and learn from each other. Email me if you are interested in joining us.

I am looking forward to an exciting year where I will be playing music for the NGS conference in Salt Lake in April/May and at the Family History Jamboree in Burbank in June, presenting songs for the Kids' Camp at each event. I am hoping that I may get to be known a bit more in the genealogical community as the folksinging genealogist!

Circlemending will also have booths at the Family History Expos in Mesa, AZ (January) and St. George, UT (February) (and probably at the ones in Sandy, UT in July and Alameda County, CA in October), and at the Family History seminar in Escondido, CA (March). We'll also be doing some performing and workshops at the Glendale (AZ) Folk and Heritage Fair in March and probably the folk festival in Flagstaff, AZ in June. We hope to remind folks at all these events that the act of singing together as families, in choirs, and in school used to be the way people entertained themselves. Among my musician friends, it's still how we spend evenings, days, or entire weekends. There is a sense of connection to one another when you share a song together.

So make that New Year's resolution to share some music with friends and/or loved ones. Come join us! There's always room for one more to sing, play, or just listen!

(To hear some of my philosophies of how music and ancestry connect, check out my Podcast with Susan E. King - scroll down to the Nov. 10 broadcast.)

Of bands, instruments, and kids: keep the music playing

For nearly as many years as I have been alive (at least, once we got a television set in about 1956), I have spent a part of Thanksgiving morning watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. It's as much a part of tradition (for me, that is) as turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce. Even though I am "under the weather" (a euphemism for "sick as a dog," or, in this case, "sick as a pig"), I still watched most of the parade yesterday morning.

I am not a huge parade lover, per se, but I am a sucker for marching bands. The Macy's parade has, as I see it, 4 primary elements: floats, enormous balloons, performing groups, and Santa (who, once I see him on the screen, tells me I now have official sanctioning to program my stereo to non-stop Christmas music and to haul out the ornaments and lights for official decorating - this year, the former applied, but I am holding off on the latter due to the illness). I enjoy watching the baton twirlers, love the drill teams (oh, yes, indeed), but the bands are amazing. I am mesmerized by a marching band.

My husband was on the Navy drill team at Great Lakes (IL) and he marched in our local parades in the area where I grew up. We tracked our personal histories to discover that he & I marched in a parade together in 1959 - he in the drill team and I in the Brownies. He was awaiting the birth of his first daughter, I was awaiting the chance to "fly up" to become a Girl Scout (after which I deserted the organization, but that's another story). My father, who of course was present for the parade, filmed (8mm, black & white, no sound) the event but only filmed 2 of the groups: the scouts (of course ... and there I was, clumsily trying to carry the flag in proper form) and the Navy drill team! When we saw that on the film a few years back, we were amazed! Was Dad astute enough to realize that was his future son-in-law he was filming? (No, you couldn't recognize him ... the shot was way too distant to differentiate the people, it was just, obviously, the drill team from Great Lakes.) Butch & I like to joke about our first date occurring when I was just 8 years old!

But back to the bands. I taught at Riverside Community College for a time and loved to listen to their Marching Tigers rehearse. They marched in the Tournament of Roses Parade on more than one occasion. And a few years ago, my friend Susan invited us to come to Yucca Valley to hear a concert by the Marine Corps Band from 29 Palms. Oh, I think I cried throughout the entire performance! And my favorite scene from Mr Holland's Opus is where he leads the high school band in the parade and they break into "Louis, Louis." I even like the part in The Music Man where the kids finally get their instruments and put on their first public "performance," as it were. But I also love bagpipe bands and even ukulele bands.

But band musicians are not easily located. I mean, it takes a lot of practice, solo and group, to be a band musician. When kids were in school, when I was growing up, they had the option to be part of "band" - the class where, for credit, they got to play music together for an hour 2 or 3 times a week. I did not opt for that as I knew I had problems with reading music and was terrified that it would be a major embarrassment for me. But I envied the kids in band. You knew who had "band" on a particular day because the kids would come to school with their little black cases, holding trumpets, flutes, saxophones, etc. Some kids had to get rides on band day because they had elected to play tuba. Well, every choice has its price! (I have a dear friend who played tuba in high school, back in the 1940s, and says that his relationship with the band and his band leader were more influential in his early development than his relationship with anyone else at that time. He went on to play the instrument in the Marine Band. He still has that tuba - it has a lot of "dings" in it, but he keeps it polished and treasures it, even though he doesn't play it any more.)

My Dad, though principally and organist & pianist, played flute at Princeton where he worked at the Institute for Advanced Study (1938-1939). It was a great stress-reliever, he told me. Back then the flutes were wooden and were harder to keep in tune as the wood would swell or shrink. But playing in the Princeton Orchestra was a high point of his time there (he talked more about that than the fact that he was doing work with Von Neumann and Einstein!). (FYI, the flute had been purchased from Sears & Roebuck Co. for, as I recall, about $15; I still have that insrument, though it is cracked and dried out and sounds pretty bad.)

I'm getting to my point (finally). What happens to those instruments and that talent when the kids graduate from high school and move on? A few (very few) manage to get music scholarships to colleges. Some (even fewer) go on to be part of community orchestras (if they play a cross-over instrument). My friend Susan, who was an outstanding flute player in high school, continues to maintain her instrument and plays it in church programs and Sunday services. But most of those instruments, if rented, go back to the music store. If they were owned, they end up in closets, attics, sold on eBay, or passed down to a younger sibling or cousin. I was given a trombone once (have no idea where it is today) by one of my grandfather's neighbors who knew I liked music. I got frustrated by it on many levels, but it was one that the neighbor's child no longer played. Many of our grandkids have played instruments in their school bands and/or orchestras: Kirbi and Emily both played violin (one that had been in our family for years, in fact) and Kirbi went on to play viola (we have both of those instruments, waiting for someone to love them again). Louis played trumpet, if I remember correctly. Jeni played oboe. Our son Max tried the flute for a year (his CP and being left-handed made it more of a challenge than an enjoyment, however).

These opportunities to play instruments with groups give kids a number of benefits in life: they learn to work with a group, they gain a new and valued mentor in their band or orchestra leader, and they get a break from the rigors of traditional school work. Playing an instrument can become an escape as well as an emotional outlet. Now that so many schools are taking this option away in their budget cuts - "band" is hardly an academic necessity - kids are needing to find other ways to develop their creative genes and learn the teamwork they get from the music programs; some such developments never happen and some occur in less than socially acceptable ways. I know that playing the flute or oboe or piccolo may not become a child's life goal, but, at least for those years in school, that can provide the stress-relief that we all seek when the demands of life are closing in. And, without the music programs in the schools, where will our future bands and orchestras come from? Most of those musicians I watched in yesterday's parade have been playing their instruments for nearly half their lives (or they wouldn't be good enough to "make it" into such a prestigious event). Without the training for the youth, who will be in those marching bands in 20 years? 15 years? 10 years? or maybe even 5 years in the future? I could not bear a parade without the bands.

Finally, I have friends who are music teachers in their respective school districts. One of those has seen the music program completed dissolved in her district. Thankfully, her educational background is broad enough that she found another teaching position. The other's music classes have been so reduced that her work hours hardly constitute a living wage. While this is a shame for these people whose passion has been to teach music to children, it is also a devastating blow to the children who are now deprived of the lessons learned in music classes. Support music programs in your children's and grandchildren's schools! Let's keep music alive for the generations to come, just as it has been part of the lives of our ancestors before us. Check out SupportMusic.com for more information.

Family Music at the Family History Expo in Utah

What did your ancestors do with music? Did they play instruments? Did they sing? Did they attend local concerts, such as the local band in the park? Maybe one of your ancestors taught other people how to play an instrument?

My granduncle, C. Harrison Hollander, played the piano-forte (piano) and absolutely loved music. He composed a few pieces and became the manager for an opera singer, Charlotte Peege, whom he later married. They lived in New York and Boston, where Charlotte could continue her career and where Harrison worked as a music critic, among other music-related jobs. Eventually they retired to Winter Park, Florida where they designed their own home, creating a huge living room with, as the focal point, a resident grand piano. They would host music gatherings and friends would fill the home as audience to Harrison on the piano and Charlotte "on" the voice.

I wonder if some of that behavior of having music in the home filtered down to me. Our house parties almost always include a number of musicians - playing guitars, banjos, autoharps, mandolins, fiddles, dulcimers, etc. - taking turns playing solo pieces or leading the whole group in singalongs. We can't imagine any other way of entertaining (and our neighbors frequently come by for a free concert).

If you would like to see a sample of this sort of activity, come to Sandy, Utah the last weekend of August. Butch & I will have a booth in the exhibit hall (#621 - way off in the corner where we can make noise & not disturb others) where we will have short demonstrations of the music of our ancestors. Also, on Sat. at 2:30, we will be doing an hour program on the music of the Mormon Pioneers called "To Zion in Song" (I'll write more about that next week).

But there is a lot of great stuff planned for the Family History Expo in Sandy, Utah ... check it out at:

Connecting with our ancestors and with other passionate genealogists

I just returned from the Family History Expo in St. George, Utah, and it was a great weekend! Unfortunately, I didn't have any time to attend the classes presented by my colleagues, but I did get to meet a number of excited genealogists of all levels. I was impressed with the number of people I met who are committed to doing thorough and accurate research and properly documenting their findings.

My husband, Butch, and I had a booth where we sold CDs and presented the music and instruments of our ancestors. A number of folks in neighboring booths enjoyed the music in the background throughout much of the 2 days and we had a great chance to tell people about how their ancestors relaxed with "homemade music." It was a lot of fun for us and, apparently, for expo attendees as well.

I also had the opportunity to present a couple of programs - my "Clue to Clue," which is a favorite of many, and a 2-part presentation on Federal Census records. Both were well-received and I connected with people who are researching the same areas that I am. One woman I met is related to a neighbor of my g-g-g-grandfather (in NY) and another woman told me that she is related to the family of a young boy who, I believe, apprenticed to my g-g-grandfather (in MI).

Part of the fun of doing genealogy is connecting with others who share the passion. When I show my exciting finds to family members and friends, most look at me as if I am crazy. At conferences, seminars, and expos, genealogists can connect to people who identify with the excitement of locating a lost ancestor, finding an elusive grave, or finally identifying a maiden name. That happened a great deal this weekend and that, in itself, made the event a high point in 2009 (and it's only March).

On Groundhog eve

It is the eve of groundhog day . . . it appears that (in California) tomorrow will be sunny, which will be nice to experience but which will cause any groundhogs to see their shadows, giving us 6 more weeks of winter. That is not a pleasant thought (and even less so for those of you in the east).

We returned from our tour of Northern California and Oregon and had a marvelous time! The weather was perfect (no snow or rain, until the last day, coming home from Sacramento). We met up with family and friends throughout the entire trip. My programs in Napa, CA and Medford, OR both went well, as did our experience at the folk festival in Florence, OR. We had a great visit with old friend Tom Paxton and enjoyed some marvelous music.

Now back in Southern Calif., we are preparing for my annual gathering of friends from all over the world (furthest traveler this year: from Guam) to view videos, eat, visit and tell stories, and do some singing. This occurs every year at about groundhog day, but won't happen until the weekend of Feb 6th. I have also been busy writing our annual groundhog letter (akin to most people's Christmas or holiday letter, telling what has happened with the family over the past year). To read this letter, go to Groundhog Letter.

Traveling genealogist/folklorist

I am on tour at the moment. It's been an interesting trip thus far. We stopped at the museum in Mariposa, CA, where they play my "Songs of the California Gold Rush" CD in the background all day long. It was a weird experience to hear that when I went into the museum! We got a VIP tour of all the grounds, including the archives for the county records in a temperature-controlled vault, built by the County, for the storage of all the documents, artifacts, and other records. What an incredible room! And they allowed room for expansion, including huge cabinets mounted on rails so they can move across the floor for easier access. Very impressive.

We also visited with one of my second cousins in Sunnyvale, then headed to the campground to relax before tomorrow's presentations I'm giving in Napa. I did some practicing once we set up camp and the folks in the campsite next to us heard me and invited us over to play some more music. They are traveling from their British Columbia home but are natives of Ireland, so we played some Irish music for them and had a lovely visit before it got too chilly and it was time to go fix dinner.

So far, the weather has been perfect and the company exceptional. Both dogs are behaving themselves and there is nothing to complain about!